he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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