just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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