HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize