oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Everyone says I win the strip club
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
