I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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