During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
