Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
my liver is dry heaving
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
