i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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