There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
