that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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