He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
