somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I wish you could order shots online.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
