Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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