like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize