Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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