had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
