Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
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