Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
