that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
