I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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