She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
