Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
