quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
