haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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