i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize