they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
