pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
