there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
