Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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