Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
