I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
