Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Green mimosas i think yes
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
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