apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
