I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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