it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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