scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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