What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
