I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize