Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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