I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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