ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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