remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
