I wish I could punch you in the face.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Randomize