Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I need a burrito and a hug.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
