doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
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