there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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