Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
