you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
This is the high leading the old right now
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
