Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize