do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Randomize
