Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
